


Black Dog

by babesrgrs



Series: Don't look back [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M, Oblivious Steve, Pining, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-18
Updated: 2017-11-18
Packaged: 2019-02-04 02:44:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12761457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babesrgrs/pseuds/babesrgrs
Summary: He could guess whom Steve was with, but he wasn't sure what exactly Steve was doing with Stark. Bucky might have been out of the game for a long time, but he knew what having sex sounded like, whether it was labored breathing or squeaking bedsprings. This wasn't it.Had it been, Bucky might have let them be – he didn't want to ruin Steve's experience, but if they were just getting started or just ”flirting” or whatever it was they did, well. Maybe he did want to ruin that. He could offer Steve an alternative to screwing Howard's kid. Steve should know his options.





	Black Dog

Things Bucky Barnes had learned in the last week or so:

1) His greatest and best friend forever, Steve, had the hots for the Stark kid whose parents Bucky had apparently murdered.  
2) His greatest and best friend forever, Steve, had the hots for a man.

Bucky was sure this would have been new information even if his memory hadn't been full of holes. The years under HYDRA were more often gone than recounted for, but Bucky had retained most of his life before the fall.

Steve liking cock wasn't a part of it.

Yet, here he was, giving relationship advice to Steve so the man could finally get some.

Stark wasn't the best candidate but Steve had shown actual interest in him and Bucky figured Stark was so into Steve he would make it good.

Steve wasn't receptive to his advice though. Bucky wasn't exactly disappointed. The thing was, Bucky had had the hots for Steve for some time now. He might have been in love, but he wasn't sure if that was exactly the same as loving someone you found attractive.

He had loved Steve a lot longer than he had wanted him. Growing up, and after, in their early twenties, Bucky thought Steve was a great guy, a better friend than most people had, a brother if not more. That was the time he tried his best to ignore how his gaze always wanted to linger on the men in uniforms whose jackets were cut to show off their shoulders. Steve with his big blue eyes and small bird-like frame didn't cross his mind that often when he couldn't ignore the wrong sort of thoughts.

The army had enough fit men to last a lifetime, and when all of a sudden his life expectancy dropped considerably, he let himself finally get a taste. Never nothing elaborate, but he got another hand on his cock more than once.

He couldn't really fantasize about a happy end in the front lines. Thinking about going back to Steve, to his family, was far too painful a dream. Still, to put his mind off the reality he had to think about something.

He had started to dream about a man. A handsome man, a perfect man. A man with wide shoulders, big hands, muscled chest. Someone with a soothing voice and protective arms.

His fantasies had been mostly sexual, of passionate encounters that weren't just nervous fumbling that left a bad taste in his mouth. They would have been in a real, clean bed, and his lover would have know him, how to touch him, would have whispered how good it was, how he loved Bucky.

Needless to say, after his best friend appeared like a fucking knight in a shining armor and saved him, now, all of a sudden, a six feet tall statue of carefully sculpted muscle, great bone structure and not a hair out of place, Bucky had been as confused as he was horny.

 

Bucky didn't expect to find anyone in the kitchen, which was why he was seen roughly the same time he took notice of Stark sitting at the table with a tiny cup of coffee in front of him. He couldn't turn back.

”You,” Stark greeted him. It was at this point almost funny but also, of course, a bit rude.

”Me,” Bucky answered. His first plan had been to cook an omelet or something, but having someone present, especially the guy who if not hated him, most likely resented having him around, canceled that plan. He went to look for a drink from the fridge.

”Killed anything recently?” Stark suddenly asked. ”People? Hearts?”

Bucky would have let it slide if it was Stark just unloading his hurt, but the hearts part was about something else. ”Been too busy doing Steve,” Bucky said, to test the waters. Also, joking about his and Steve's passionate love came naturally to him now. Steve didn't seem to mind and maybe, maybe it would introduce the idea to Steve.

A long silence. ”Remember any details yet?”

Stark was calling his bluff.

”You know Steve,” Bucky tried, ”he's shy about these things, wouldn't appreciate me telling tales.”

Stark sipped his tiny coffee. ”Shy, huh? That's not my experience with him.”

”And what's your experience?” Bucky couldn't but ask. He knew they had flirted or something, but Steve said nothing had happened.

”Well, he has a very dirty mouth and he doesn't mind showing off his body, but surely you knew that.”

Bucky blinked. It didn't sound like Stark was lying, but Bucky was sure that they hadn't slept together.

”Doesn't mean he doesn't like his privacy,” Bucky countered.

Stark crossed his arms and leaned back in the chair. ”Come on, I'm sure Steve wouldn't mind if you told me. Or is there nothing to tell?”

Bucky glared at him. ”How I see it is you passed up your chance, I don't see why I should tell you anything.”

”Just because I let him go doesn't mean I believe for a second you have gotten a turn with our resident G.I. Joe.”

Bucky poured himself a glass of orange juice, tried to seem nonchalant. He hadn't even been really pursuing Steve, but it sort of got to him that Stark thought it was so unbelievable. Maybe they had always been friends first and foremost, but why couldn't they have been together? Steve had defied the whole world to save him. That counted for fucking something, right?

Sure, he was a mutilated mental case, but some days he almost had it together. 

”Believe what you will,” Bucky said. ”I don't need your faith to add a white stripe to Steve's uniform.”

Stark seemed to be on the verge of either laughter or outrage, Bucky wasn't sure. ”I swear to God, Barnes, I just fixed that suit,” Stark started, ”Keep your perverted sessions away from it.”

”Take your concerns to Steve. I'm not the one who wants to role play,” Bucky said and turned to leave.

”It's not roleplaying if the superhero is your alter ego!” Stark yelled after him.

Passing by a horrified Parker in the hallway, Bucky headed out from the facility. He still needed to eat.

 

The thing was, Bucky could read Steve like an open book. If he had a secret, Bucky could probably guess what it was from the way Steve held himself. Steve was absolutely shit at keeping his crushes from Bucky. All he had to do was say their name with that telling hesitancy like he was wondering himself if Bucky would know now. And oh, he would.

Steve had never shown any signs that he was interested in Bucky which was one of the biggest reasons Bucky hadn't tried to make changes to their relationship. Now though, it had become clear that Steve had hidden his attraction to men from Bucky their whole life. Bucky was annoyed but also hopeful. What else had Steve hidden?

Maybe, maybe a passion for his best friend?

Bucky gestured at the waitress to bring the bill. She came like she'd been waiting for it. Bucky smiled, looked her into the eyes and thanked her. The blinding smile she gave him confirmed that Bucky still had it.

He was in a great shape, stacked like never before. If he cleaned up and tried to hit on Steve a bit, perhaps his dear friend and savior would get the hint. Perhaps Steve would reveal that he, too, wondered what it would be like between them when they knew each other so well.

”Tell me,” he said to the waitress, ”are there any good clothes shops around here?”

 

Bucky swiped a lock of hair nervously away from his eyes. On top of the new wardrobe he also had a new haircut. He had cut it close to the same style he kept it in the 40s, but letting it fall a bit over his eyes. He'd also shaved carefully and put on a fitted pair of dark blue jeans and a white, tight T-shirt under his new leather jacket.

He was ready to find Steve and ask him out for a ride or something.

Having changed his clothes in the guest room he sometimes used, Bucky strode into Steve's rooms. He was nervous, but he figured it was best to just get it over with.

He knew Steve wasn't alone the very moment he entered. For a reason or another he didn't make himself known. Instead, he closed the door silently. The sounds came from the bedroom. Bucky trod carefully towards it.

He could guess whom Steve was with, but he wasn't sure what exactly Steve was doing with Stark. Bucky might have been out of the game for a long time, but he knew what having sex sounded like, whether it was labored breathing or squeaking bedsprings. This wasn't it.

Had it been, Bucky might have let them be – he didn't want to ruin Steve's experience, but if they were just getting started or just ”flirting” or whatever it was they did, well. Maybe he did want to ruin that. He could offer Steve an alternative to screwing Howard's kid. Steve should know his options.

He opened the door loudly and suddenly. He wanted a laugh out of this at least.

As he'd hoped, Stark jumped about a mile from where he stood at the end of the bed and turned around to see who or what had interrupted them.

”Bucky!” Steve yelped, didn't jump from where he was half lying _on the bed._ He had his clothes on – well, he had his suit on, the tight black one. 

”I'm not interrupting anything?” Bucky asked and flashed a knowing smile.

Then came the moment when Steve took him in, his mouth falling open. Even Stark seemed to do a double take.

”I brought the suit for Steve to try on,” Stark volunteered first, not happily.

Bucky raised his eyebrow at how Steve was leaning back on his arms, serving his body like it was a free for all buffet.

”Tony helped me with the boots,” Steve explained, which didn't really explain anything, because since when did Steve not know how to tie his own shoes? But Bucky let it go, sure the two idiots probably told themselves it was just business as usual, fitting a skin-tight suit behind closed doors.

”Looks good,” Bucky said.

”Ah, you too. Did you cut your hair?” 

”Yes. I figured I've been putting it off for too long. Thought I'd go out. Wanna join? Like the old times,” Bucky added, mostly because he had this notion that Steve would like it. There was little of their old times in what he wanted to happen.

”If you promise no double dates,” Steve said.

”I promise no dates at all,” Bucky answered, an easy promise to make, ”just the two of us.”

Steve smiled. ”Deal.”

Stark didn't look impressed.

 

”I mean it,” Steve said when he had changed into something more casual and they were on their way, borrowing Natasha's car, ”you look really good.”

They could have walked to the small center Bucky had gone before to eat, it had a bar or two, but Bucky had decided they should head out to the more populated parts of the city. What was the point of having two hot supersoldiers going out if next to nobody would see them?

”Thanks,” Bucky said, pleased. So far so good.

The car left safely in a garage, they found themselves a bar. It wasn't packed, but that was to be expected since it was a weeknight and not very late. For the assortment of businessmen and other people in suits at the counter it was still obviously after work hours.

”I don't know if the looks we get are because they recognize us or because we are so hot,” Bucky drawled after he had gotten them beers and they had sat down in a booth.

Steve smiled. ”Why not both?”

”I'll take that,” Bucky grinned. He could practically feel people looking at him, but he did not let it show that he'd even noticed. Let them see he only had eyes for Steve.

Bucky drank his beer maybe a bit too fast but he felt good, careless for a change. He wasn't in danger of getting wasted on just beer though, not anymore, so it wasn't like it mattered much. He ordered a second round. Steve got the hint and finished his own beer to keep up. 

Bucky was encouraged Steve played along. ”So. Care to tell me what's going on with Stark? Last time we talked about it you decided not to go after him. Today I catch you two in your bedroom, with the door closed.”

Steve looked abashed. ”I don't know. He brought the suit, I needed to try it on. I went to change in the bedroom.”

”And he just followed you there?”

Steve shrugged. ”Kind of. I mean, we were talking and it didn't really seem out of place. I have changed in front of him before, you know. We're in the same crime-fighting team.”

”And then?”

Steve sipped his drink. ”Then nothing. He had new fastenings for the shoes and he had to adjust them.”

It sounded plausible, but Bucky wasn't fooled. No chance there just wasn't a way for Steve to test the fit of the suit without Stark in his space, in his bedroom. 

Well. At least they hadn't been screwing. And at least they were talking about the topic Bucky wanted.

”What about that blonde you kissed?”

”You mean Sharon?”

Bucky nodded. He wasn't sure if she'd been a Sharon, but he was curious about every girl Steve'd been kissing.

”It wasn't really the right time, ever.”

”Like with you and Stark?”

Steve got a sober look on his face. ”Kinda. With Tony, it doesn't seem to happen, with Sharon... It already just didn't.”

Bucky was glad to hear it. ”So are you looking at the moment?”

”I thought you promised no dates,” Steve reminded him, like _that_ was Bucky's plan.

”I'm keeping my promises, don't worry. I was just wondering if you met someone, right now, would you go with it? Or are you saving yourself for Stark?”

Steve clearly disliked Bucky's choice of words. He rolled his eyes. ”I'm not saving myself. And obviously it would depend on the person, but theoretically, sure. Yes. Any more questions?”

Bucky smiled. ”No. I'm all satisfied.”

Steve snorted. ”Yeah?”

Bucky leaned back on the bench. Gave Steve a look. ”Well. Not _all_ satisfied.”

Steve chuckled like it was a good joke or something. Bucky tried to rationalize finding his flirting funny was better than finding it offensive.

”I take that you are looking?” Steve asked.

”Maybe,” Bucky answered. He decided to throw caution to the wind. ”Maybe I've already found someone.”

Steve froze. ”Really?” He asked and quickly looked around the bar like Bucky had his eye on one of the middle-aged businessmen or the too young college girls giggling next to the pool table or the old skeeve eyeing up the girls.

Jesus. How the hell did Stark do this?

”Tell me,” Steve said.

Leaning a bit forward, like he was telling a secret, Bucky started: ”You know when you see somebody who looks wise, exceeds even your most unrealistic fantasies, and then happens to be really great in other ways too: brave and kind and charming?”

Steve was silent for a beat. Then he asked, gently: ”Buck, are you in love?”

Well. He swallowed. ”Not really.” Then: ”A bit, maybe.”

”I'm glad for you.”

No signs of jealousy, Bucky noted. If Steve really didn't get it was him Bucky was talking about, he didn't seem to mind.

Finishing his second beer Bucky decided he didn't care. He would try to seduce Steve in any case. Too much of his life had been spent for causes other than his own. He'd take Sam's advice and try to live for himself. Maybe he didn't deserve good things, but he had learned to think about his life after HYDRA a fuck you to the Nazi snakes. If he enjoyed life, created something good and nice, they hadn't won. They hadn't ruined a man completely. And anyway, the worst thing that could happen now was that Steve said no. That was nothing. He'd apologize, they'd talk it through and that was it. He wouldn't lose Steve over something like this, not after what they'd been through. The only thing he could lose was the chance to joke about their imaginary sex life.

He looked around the bar, trying to breathe deeply against the current of nervous and titillating thoughts his decision had woken up. A man sang about riding a steel horse and being wanted dead or alive. Bucky computed barely the word 'wanted', if only because of how much he himself wanted. Most days went by smoothly enough, his desires to be with Steve _like that_ more or less passing thoughts. Recurring, maybe, but he hadn't had this burning urge to wrestle Steve to the ground and just go at it very often.

The old fantasies about long, loving hours spent in a bed made room for yearning it fast and dirty, preferably against the back alley wall with their clothes on, broken glass crunched to sand under their boots.

It was crazy he could feel like this while Steve was just sitting there, telling about a time he had to make motivational videos for school kids and how Sam still teased him about it.

”It was kind of cringy though, so it's not like I can blame him.”

”If you say so,” Bucky forced out.

”What? I was sure you'd love to hear about me making a fool out of myself.”

Bucky did his best to smile. ”I do.”

”But? What are you thinking?”''

”Just – ” he sighed.

”Is it your – ” Steve searched for the word, looked to the side, ”crush?”

Bucky grimaced. This was straight out of a bad romantic comedy, except that if that had been the case, he could at least count on getting Steve at the end. There was no such guarantee now.

After his obviously uncomfortable silence Steve tried to comfort him. ”You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. Just know I'd like to hear.”

Bucky stood up. He'd had enough. ”Let's go.”

Steve looked surprised, and no wonder, he hadn't finished his drink. To his credit, he did as Bucky told and followed him out of the bar.

”What's the matter?” Steve asked. Bucky waved at his concern. He headed for the alley up next. He pulled Steve with him. The sun hadn't set completely, but the walls on either side gave enough shadows so they were not too easily spotted.

”Buck? Did I say something?”

”Shut up.”

”Okay,” Steve said slowly. Bucky didn't always appreciate Steve's patience with him, but that wasn't the case now. If he wanted to find something to say, Steve needed to let him think.

This was the moment. Maybe he should just kiss Steve, in case Steve wasn't interested and this was his only chance to kiss him, ever. 

If only he wasn't afraid Steve would think he was attacking him or something.

Hell. He cleared his throat, combed his hand nervously through his hair. At that moment, his hand up, he could see how, for a brief moment, Steve's gaze dropped down to his chest where the shirt stretched across his pecs before returning back up. Okay. Steve wasn't completely uninterested in his body at least. That was – something. That gave him the much-needed drop of courage.

”Steve. Do you find me attractive?” Bucky asked and felt a unique mix of relief and terror. Relief he'd finally said it, terror, because now he'd have to face the music.

Steve, Bucky realized with despair, didn't seem to get it. ”Buck, you know you're very handsome. I can't think that anybody would turn you down based on your looks.”

”Okay. Okay.”

”Okay?”

”Yes. No,” Bucky groaned. Then, the last try: ”What about you? Would you turn me down?”

A second and another and fucking finally, Steve got it. Bucky didn't remember Steve ever being this slow. 

Mouth slightly open from a surprise Steve was silent.

”Buddy, you're killing me here,” Bucky pleaded. ”You don't – we don't have to, just... say something?”

”Uh, I – wouldn't it be weird?” Steve finally asked. He'd crossed his arms awkwardly, like every time he was uncomfortable.

And okay, that certainly answered the question whether or not Steve had wanted him secretly for all these years. Jesus. 

Had Bucky gone through the earlier plan to seduce Steve, he'd have taken the opportunity to emphatically tell him that no, it would definitely not be weird, it would be hot and good and satisfying. As he was feeling mostly defeated, he merely asked: ”Why?”

Steve visibly swallowed. ”Well. We're best friends.”

Bucky waited. ”And?”

Steve sighed. Bucky could sense the oncoming gentle speech Steve was going to turn him down with. He didn't want to give Steve the chance.

”Steve, if you don't find me attractive that's fine. That's not something you can control. Just don't come up with some bullshit excuse about us being friends that's the problem.”

”Buck, I have eyes. In fact, I have perfect vision, so I'm not going to lie about 'not finding you attractive'.”

”There's more to attraction than looks,” Bucky dared to say. He knew he wasn't anybody's ideal partner, not with a metal arm and a scarred psyche and dozens of assassinations hanging over him.

”Well, whatever the _more_ is, you've got it too.” 

Bucky was losing his mind a bit, here. ”Then what is it?” he demanded, too loud. He looked around in case they were attracting audience.

Steve had a pained look on his face. ”Could we continue this at home?” He asked, clearly conscious of their lack of privacy as well.

Bucky nodded, frustrated. He wasn't looking forward to the ride home.

 

Arriving at Steve's rooms, the first thing Steve did was go to the small kitchenette and make tea. Bucky almost wanted to roll his eyes at it, like tea would help, like he was some young thing with a broken heart and Steve was his old aunt.

”Would you sit down?” Steve asked, not looking at where Bucky was standing still with his arms crossed, probably sensing his unease.

Bucky did. Having a drink with Steve in the peace of his rooms was normally the best his life got now. He would never have thought the gaudy mugs they drank instant coffee from would look uninviting.

Steve set the orange and yellow mugs with teabags in them on the table. He waited until the water had boiled and he'd filled their mugs before he said anything.

”Bucky, you are everything to me.”

”Not everything,” Bucky reminded quickly.

Steve sighed. ”I do think you are really attractive, you know. I have drawn you enough times to realize it. I just know you so well as my best friend, a guy closer than a brother.”

”That what?”

”That it's what comes first when I look at you.”

It all still sounded a lot like 'I don't find you all that hot', but maybe Bucky sort of got it. He hadn't wanted Steve before the serum. It hadn't all been because he preferred big guys: he liked little guys just fine. Instead, the shape of Steve had been hard-wired to his brain as something familiar, easy, comfortable. Not something provocative like Steve _after_ was.

Bucky tried to think. He hadn't gotten a definitive 'no way in hell' yet. ”So you don't think I'm... damaged?”

Steve whipped his head around like he only did when he was mortally affronted. ”Never. Jeez, Buck.”

Okay. He had been brave before. The hardest part was over, anyway. He'd confessed his feelings. ”You don't think it might be possible to – change what you think first when you see me?”

Steve cleared his throat. ”You mean... ?”

”Maybe if we tried,” Bucky started. He tried to look nonchalant. Probably failed. ”You know, to have – ”

”Oh.”

”Yeah,” Bucky confirmed nervously.

”What if – if it doesn't work?”

Then it would feel really fucking bad. ”Then it doesn't. We stop. Laugh. Go back like we were and forget about it.”

Bucky could read Steve like an open book, but at the moment he wasn't too keen on this particular talent. Steve wasn't completely sold on the idea. He was probably trying to estimate how far he would go to please Bucky, to help him. It was most likely not very flattering that Bucky was hoping the answer was 'very'. If Steve decided to have pity sex with him, he would take it.

After a while, Steve smiled tentatively. ”Okay. Let's try.”

”Yeah?” Bucky could barely believe he'd talked Steve into bed with him.

”You can't laugh at me, though.”

That hadn't even crossed his mind. Why the hell would he laugh when he'd gotten one of his dreams come true, if not out of joy, of course? ”You don't have to worry about that.”

”I trust you,” Steve said, not particularly solemnly, but Bucky knew he meant it.

That was heart-warming and horrible. Bucky wasn't to be trusted in this. Sure, he'd rather cut his right arm before hurting Steve again, but there were only a few things he considered hurtful anymore. At the moment he was deciding on the best way to guarantee Steve really would sleep with him. He'd figured that he couldn't leave this to a later date, it could very well be too awkward by then. He'd have to make a move now.

”You have nowhere to be tonight, right?”

 

”You know you can say no anytime,” Bucky said, a panicked effort to be a decent person and give Steve an out if he had doubts. Steve just started walking towards the bedroom. After Steve's initial surprise at the hurried timetable Bucky had proposed, he'd nodded a yes. Soon it turned out Steve had really decided to do this since he had poured the rest of his tea away and given Bucky a questioning glance: _are you ready?_

”You know _you_ can say 'no' anytime,” Steve parroted like Bucky was having second thoughts. It was also a challenge, but a familiar one. Bucky knew he could do his worst and Steve would be there on the other side.

He took three long strides to catch up with Steve. When Steve raised his hand to open the door, Bucky was there already. He slammed into Steve, pushed him against the door.

”Buck!” Steve yelped but didn't fight back.

Bucky wasn't sure what he was doing exactly but knew that violence was often a lot easier than tenderness. It was easier to touch Steve like this, easier to close the distance.

Being glued together from knees to shoulders brought Steve's ass right against his crotch. Unable to stop himself, Bucky pressed his hips carefully forwards.

Bucky could only hope Steve found the implied intention as exciting as he. He thought that maybe starting like this had been a good idea. Steve didn't see his face, but he did feel him. Steve liked guys and he liked Bucky's body. He could think of anyone he wanted.

They couldn't kiss like this, and maybe that was for the best, too. Kissing was different from sex, more intimate. Steve didn't need to catch Bucky's eyes while they were going at it, breathe his breath, taste his spit. 

Bucky didn't need to see Steve realizing who he was with and get second thoughts.

Wrapping his metal arm around Steve Bucky pulled him tightly against him, pulled him back against the slow thrust of Bucky's hips. He brought the other hand to Steve's body as well, feeling him up, palming his chest. He didn't dare lower his hand just yet, not wanting to know if Steve was aroused.

He'd have to stop if Steve wasn't.

Like this, he could go on until Steve said no and Steve would surely say no if he wasn't into this. Bucky had a metal arm, but Steve had a metal backbone. He wouldn't go on with it just because he didn't want to disappoint Bucky. Surely.

Bucky bit into Steve's shoulder, mouthed the back of his neck. He was just tall enough he could reach to lick Steve's ear. That made Steve gasp and arch his neck. Bucky kissed the pale skin hungrily, sucked it. Steve might heal fast, but he wouldn't go anywhere tonight with the bruises Bucky planned to make.

At this point, Steve had to feel that Bucky was hard, and Jesus was he. Bucky had never fucked anyone, it'd always been just hands, but being like this – the heady knowledge that men could fuck each other made everything in his head stop for a second. He squeezed Steve tighter against him, an iron grip, he knew it had to be uncomfortable already. This wasn't really sex anymore, he was trying to melt into Steve.

”Buck,” Steve said. Bucky froze, let up a bit and landed a couple of kisses onto the top vertebra that peeked under collar of Steve's shirt. ”Yeah?” He murmured, kissed the skin under his lips again like he just hadn't lost it a moment ago.

”Let me turn?” Steve asked. He didn't sound apologetic like he would if this was it. Bucky considered backing up, but the want to stay right there won out. He did move his metal hand, pressed it against the door. 

Steve turned around in the tiny space. Bucky enjoyed it. He mustered all the courage he got left and looked Steve in the eye. He hoped he was smiling and not cringing.

Steve huffed. ”Were you planning to screw me through the bedroom door?”

Now Bucky did have a real smile to offer. ”Maybe.”

”I have a bed,” Steve pointed out.

Bucky answered by turning the door handle. Steve stumbled back, might have fallen if Bucky hadn't caught him. ”Careful,” Bucky commented before giving Steve a shove that landed him on his back on the bed.

”Really?” Steve asked, not too impressed at being manhandled. He moved up on the bed until he had the headboard behind his back.

”You shouldn't wear shoes to bed,” Bucky stated, unsure whether or not he could just join Steve.

Steve offered his foot to Bucky. ”Take them off, then.”

Bucky mock glared Steve. ”Since when am I your lackey?” He did grab the boot and pull it off, though. The sock, too. He repeated the motions with the other foot.

”You're the one who wants me naked,” Steve said. ”I assume,” he added.

”For practical reasons only,” Bucky shoot back. This was going okay, he figured. Their banter was both welcome and not. It relaxed Bucky, but it also changed the mood to easy, normal. Bucky didn't want that, he wanted dangerous and thrilling. He wanted Steve to remember this night as something special, something to think back on when he took himself into his hand. Something he couldn't get enough of.

Steve smirked. ”I see.” Then he peeled both his shirts off in one move, threw them to the side. He spread his legs a bit, rested his hands on his thighs.

God damn it, but Stark had been right. Steve did like to show off his body. Bucky gulped. Okay. He stood stupidly in his spot and stared at the picture Steve made. Shirtless was definitely Steve's best look. 

”Don't you think you should take something off as well? For practical reasons,” Steve asked innocently.

Ha ha. Bucky nodded. Sure. He crouched to unlace his shoes which turned out to be harder than one would think. With his shoes and socks off he barely hesitated before copying Steve and stripping off his shirt. Steve had seen his scars before, and Bucky knew his muscled form turned heads.

If Steve had seemed amused before, he sure didn't anymore. The atmosphere had changed, too. His somewhat flagged hard on got new life just from the intense way Steve was eyeing him up. 

Bucky had barely gotten his knee on the bed when Steve grabbed him with his legs and pulled on top of him. It was a good move, brought your opponent close enough that they couldn't get a good hit. Out of a reflex Bucky bent his knees, leaned back and pulled Steve more snugly onto his lap, so he got Steve's weight off the bed.

Steve should have tried to get a better hold with his legs to break the upper hand Bucky had. Instead, he pushed himself to sit up – in Bucky's lap. Bucky adjusted his grip on Steve's hips so his hands covered Steve's ass. 

Steve looked down at him thoughtfully. Bucky knew this was the moment to kiss Steve, but he cowed at the last moment and pressed his lips to Steve's chest instead. It was probably ridiculous, him being afraid to kiss Steve when he was half naked in his lap, but. They'd always been very physical with each other, Bucky had hugged, petted, hit, smothered and bit Steve before.

Kissing was – well. Scary.

At the moment it didn't matter since Steve gasped and when Bucky's mouth found a nipple, Steve gripped the back of Bucky's head to keep him there.

”Buck,” Steve moaned, surprised. That was good. That was really good. Bucky leaned forward so they fell back down on the bed. Bucky continued his ministrations until Steve started to raise his hips up. Bucky could finally put his hand on Steve's cock, now sure Steve was aroused. 

He was. Bucky palmed him through the jeans, ”fuck, Steve,” he mumbled.

A wave of desire hot like the wind in Sahara descended on him. It made him rip Steve's jeans open, mouth a line down, down to where Steve's cock was straining against the cotton of his underwear. 

Steve grunted and tightened his legs around Bucky. It was the best feeling, really, to be clenched between the thighs of the man who'd never given up on him, who'd saved him from the grips of evil twice over, whom he'd followed around for close to a century now. People compared Steve to a golden retriever, but out of the two of them Bucky was the damn dog. He'd once given his loyalty and heart to Steve and he would happily hang around for as long as they lived. Some greedy, cruel pieces of shit might have beaten him a new personality, but nothing had erased Steve from his bones.

He was where he was meant to be.

Steve's pants, on the other hand, weren't. He broke away from the sweet grip of powerful thighs to peel the jeans off. Steve let him do it, let him take the underwear, too.

”You too,” Steve said like Bucky had a brain cell left for even the simplest of operations. He needed Steve's hands on his zipper to regain enough of his cognitive skills to take the rest of his clothes off.

Coming together skin to skin was a piece of paradise, everything he'd never had. Steve's hands on his back, on his ass, were like a brand, claiming him. 

Now that they were face to face he couldn't put it off anymore, didn't want to. Bucky nuzzled Steve's jaw, his cheek, like circling his target. Just before he dared to taste Steve's lips he curled his fist around Steve's hard, hot cock. A diversion.

Steve's gasp was intercepted by Bucky's mouth. Having finally gotten around it, Bucky went for the kill. He drove right past gentle lane and pushed his tongue in. Devouring Steve's mouth he wanted Steve to think about all the other ways Bucky could get inside him. Every time he let up a bit he made sure to give Steve's cock a tight stroke, to keep Steve from thinking about anything else.

Next time he came up for air, his hand faltered – Steve had bettered his grip on Bucky ass, he had slipped the fingers of his right hand into his crack. Bucky did the only thing a man could do, really, he pushed back into it.

The next kiss they shared was desperate, aggressive. Bucky willed Steve to recognize his plea from the way he bit his lips and sucked his tongue: _put it in, put it in, put it in._

Steve did. Just one finger, his middle, maybe. It wasn't comfortable, there should have been something to slick the way, but it was close to perfect. Bucky groaned involuntarily. His cock throbbed like mad, he had to get his now, he was going crazy with it.

With a final, clumsy kiss he changed his position so he was sitting astride Steve's lap, so he could get the finger deeper in him. Forced by his lust he had to release his grip on Steve's cock and grab his own. He stroked himself fast and hard, he knew there was a litany of low grunts escaping his lips but he couldn't give a fuck right then, he was too close.

Steve started to push another finger in and that was it. He jerked and a surge of hot pleasure shoot through him, out of him. With the last of his will he opened his eyes to meet Steve's dark, wild stare, to see how his come splashed onto the sculpted pectorals of the man of his dreams. 

He was panting and sweaty and he felt like he was sitting on top of the world. Steve's flushed face was a marvel to gaze upon. A streak of come had reached his chin. Bucky leaned down to lick it off. He let his tongue reach Steve's mouth and dipped it between the open lips. Steve moaned and grabbed Bucky's hair with left hand.

His right hand he started to pull away, but Bucky clenched around his fingers. ”Not yet,” he whispered.

Steve nodded and kissed him gently. After a sweet while making out Steve slowly slid the fingers away.

He assumed and hoped Steve must have been burning with want so he reinstated his hand on Steve's cock. He was right: Steve started to push into his fist right from the first stroke. God. He murmured: ”I got you, I got you” over and again. Amidst Steve's groans he changed it up and whispered: ”I love you.”

Thighs shaking Steve came. 

 

After, Bucky laid mostly on top of Steve. Not willing to leave the room Bucky had fished a towel from a dresser to wipe them clean. He had reclaimed his place quickly after, kissed Steve while it was still allowed.

All in all, it had been fucking great and he hoped Steve felt the same way. Steve had at least come and he had looked like he was into it when he had – watched Bucky. Bucky felt a throb of mild embarrassment when he thought about how enthusiastic he himself had been, afraid it had been too much.

Well, it couldn't be helped, now. Steve wasn't going to start avoiding him because Bucky had enjoyed their fooling around.

Instead, Steve would probably try to thank him any minute now, Bucky mused. Usually, the idiot didn't care about good manners around Bucky, but at times when he was wrong-footed his polite nature would win over. _Thank you, Buck, for letting me put my finger up your ass._ Bucky snorted into Steve's shoulder.

”What?” Steve asked.

”Nothing.” Steve couldn't see his smile but maybe he heard it. 

Bucky knew _Steve_ was smiling when he went on to point out that Bucky had promised he wouldn't laugh.

”I wasn't laughing at you,” Bucky insisted.

”Were you laughing at yourself?”

Bucky moved a bit closer, if possible. ”No.”

”So you are just cracking jokes inside your head about nothing in particular? When you are lying on top of me, naked. After we had sex.”

Now grinning, Bucky raised his head, murmured: ”It was really good.” Then: ”Idiot.”

Steve's smile transformed into something smug – well, as smug as Steve could look. ”It was alright, I suppose.”

” _Alright?_ Since when are you an expert in sex? Don't tell me you've taken advantage of your inhumanely good looks and manipulated some poor soul to give it up to you.”

”Is that what just happened?” Steve asked, grinning.

”Fuck you,” Bucky said.

”Well,” Steve started, but Bucky slapped his hand across Steve's mouth before he could finish his insuffereable thought.

Steve began laughing and Bucky was left staring at his best everything guffaw against the metal hand. He'd sort of thought about it before, but now it really hit home that he'd never find somebody who'd get him like Steve did. He'd never find someone who didn't fear him at all like Steve didn't, someone who believed in him like Steve did.

Bucky leaned forward and let his teeth worry the skin on Steve's neck. ”I didn't fuck you,” he pointed out, voice low.

”Not yet.”

Steve stopped laughing. He took gently hold of Bucky's hand and removed it from is mouth – not far, though. He nuzzled it, eyes closed, and pressed a kiss to the metal wrist. 

Bucky swallowed. He hadn't expected this, for Steve to be so gentle and open with him. He knew that was Steve's usual modus operandi when it came to Bucky, but he still had not expected it in this. He had anticipated having to work so he wouldn't scare Steve off, needing to distract Steve from putting a stop to their fooling around.

But no. Steve gave and gave and gave. Bucky found that he would take it all. Also that he could give, too.

”You're beautiful.”

Steve looked away, embarrassed. Still holding Bucky's hand, though.

”You're biased,” he replied.

Well. Bucky snorted. ”That goes without saying.” No matter what else people thought about him, nobody could deny that truth. He was Steve's guy through and through. In every way.

He could only hope Steve felt the same way.


End file.
